Day 15 - 7:15 p.m. - word count: 21,109 (and yea close to giving up...)

The last few days have been really rough for me. I can’t seem to get out of this funk.

I started writing something else today – a portion of the book that happens later. I think I’ve been trying to write everything as it chronologically happens in the book. I’m being too strict perhaps.

I think it’s also I miss my family so much. I dream about popzilla and kidzilla every night. Sometimes, I get so tired in the writing studio that I go to my room to take a nap and I end up vividly dreaming about them again. I’ve enjoyed my time here immensely and the thought of leaving really depresses me. But, I’m also ready to go home, to be surrounded by the people I love. I especially miss getting and giving unsolicited hugs. :(

It was a very busy weekend here. On Saturday, Ines hosted a party at her beach house (fact – you can lease a beach house (steps from the water, the dolphins, etc) here in New Smyrna for under $600 a month). I didn’t go to the party but the majority of the associates attended and apparently the party went on until the next day. They left here around 4:30 on Saturday and didn’t arrive back here until about that time the next day. You could see it was worth it on everyone’s faces. They all looked so tanned, happy and relaxed.

Sunday, Jessica hosted a dinner for the writers & visual artists and Davy hosted another dinner for the composers. It was a lovely dinner. I helped to crush garlic again. I am an excellent crusher of garlic. I should list it in my resume as one of my hobbies. After dinner, everyone walked over to the theatre to watch the Aquatic Life of Steve Zissou. I was there for the first half hour and then, I turned into a pumpkin. I figure it’s on my netflix queue…

5 days to go… my goal is still to finish the first draft of this book… but I won’t be disappointed or surprised if I don’t accomplish that. What I have completed I’m quite proud of and today I mentioned to Jessica that I feel very humbled when I’m around every body or even one writers associate who compliments my work because I haven’t done any formal academic coursework on the fiction/creative writing. I really just think people are blowing sunshine up my ass. To which she responded with more compliments about my writing and the theory that maybe my poetry background plays a bigger part in my writing than I give it credit for…

Anyhoo. the associates are headed en masse to sing karaoke at a tavern in town tomorrow and then, possibly to watch the film “Crash”. I want to see this movie but not at the expense of singing a song. I can wait for it on netflix. Wednesday, a handful are going to look for alligators in a rented pontoon. One or two of the other master artists is doing their outreach in the area on Thursday or Friday. Then, Saturday, the associates are showing their work at an interdisciplinary show here at ACA – open studios, mini concerts and readings. It’s going to go by so fast…